Monday, June 13, 2005

The Glancing Game


The Glancing Game (tm) is a popular game enjoyed on the Paris metro involving two or more players. Though the game's origins are somtimes disputed by scholars in the field, most believe that the game began spontaneously one fateful Sunday afternoon when Sir Bimsley Coggleworth grew smitten with a fellow passenger, one Madamoiselle Antoinette Du Fonnetenay. The Glancing Game's (tm) popularity spread thoughout the Paris metro with the expansion of the underground tunnels, enlisting not only famous players from the French bourgeoisie, but those from the lower classes as well. In fact, the game transcends cultural, ethnic, religious and social lines, though rarely reaches across sexual lines, since the game requires Glances which are both reciprocal and sexual in nature. Since it involves no dice, cards, or other game pieces, the game can be played by anyone, at any time of the day.

Official Rules and Regulations

1. Players One and Two must sit facing each other on the car, though thier positions are not limited to a particular section of seats. Thus, the players may sit as close as six inches and as far as ten meters from each other.

2. Players One and Two must be able to see each other. If another passenger sits in between the two players and thus blocks the players sight of each other, the game is over.

3. The game begins when Player One notices the apparent attractiveness of Player Two. Player One then fixes his or her look on Player Two, and awaits acknowledgement of the commencement of the game.

4. When Player Two recognizes Player One's stare, this recognition must be small. Player Two returns the stare, but for no more than a few seconds.

5. Player One notes Player Two's acknowledgement by pretending that Player One's initial look was accidental. This is easily accomplished by averting the glance elsewhere. Examples include but are not limited to: out the window, behind Player Two, the person next to Player Two, the prominently displayed Metro maps, etc.

6. Player Two must then proceed by fixing his or her look on Player One.

7. Player One then shifts his or her glance to Player Two. The game has officially begun.

8. Glances are exchanged, then, back and forth, repeatedly, by Players One and Two throughout the course of the journey. The players can increase the time of Locked Eyes to their liking, but cannot make any other outward signs of recognition, including but not limited to: smiling, winking, waving or licking lips/teeth.

9. Both players must realize, prior to gameplay, that any of the aforementioned signs of recognition are considered taboo in most social circles. Any breach of the game rules leads to immediate dismissal by the other player, who will most likely exit the train or change seats.

10. As the egos of the players enjoy quite a stroking during gameplay, they should feel free to enhance their performance and the other's fantasy by bringing any available accessories into gameplay, including, but not limited to the following: a hip or trashy magazine, an intellectual or pulp fiction book, a newspaper, a hidden hat or gloves.

11. The game ends when a player reaches his or her destination and exits the car. If both exit at the same stop, the game can possibly be continued on the quai or on the escalator. Players are permitted to speak to each other once they have exited the station, thus finding themselves in a reasonable arena to hit on each other. Any prior contact will most likely lead to a game of Cold Shouler (tm) or Total Rejection! (tm).